Encouraging the Unenthusiastic Reader :)

"Students will read if we give them the books, the time

 and the enthusiastic encouragement to do so."  

                         - Donnalynn Miller, "The Book Whisperer"

"Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them." 

- James Baldwin (writer)

This is the eighth blog entry of this school year, all focused on Home Reading, to help families successfully support children as they learn to read :)

The most challenging parts of parenting, at least from my perspective, are those parts that sneak up on you when you are least expecting them - like toddlers who slept as infants but have now abandoned the practice, or a school-aged child who ate strawberries every chance she got but has just declared she hates them and refuses to take them in her lunch (after you paid a fortune for them for just that purpose!!). 

Home reading offers similar challenges for parents - just when you think you have figured out what the school expects from your child around 'home reading' - a routine reading time, positive parental support, a book chosen with the child or by herself, praising effort not success, not pointing out mistakes or covering the pictures, signing off on daily reading - all of a sudden, your child no longer wants to read at home at all! Refuses, whines, runs to the bedroom or bathroom, says they don't like every book that is offered, is hungry/tired/thirsty...any excuse to escape trying to read with you - and clearly does not care at all about "what will your teacher say??".  Your child feels like they have been reading for a while (could be days or weeks or even just once before); they perceive reading as hard work, or it might feel like just 'doing more school', or they may think of many other things they would prefer to be doing - like tablet time, watching a show, playing with friends. They do NOT want to sit with you and try to read that sorry book again and will do pretty much anything to avoid home reading altogether.  

Well, this was unexpected...and what is more unexpected will be the things you discover about yourself as you begin to peel back the layers to determine why this apparently sudden mutiny towards home reading.

To begin with, if this is the first sign of mutiny and refusing to engage in reading, consider the day your child has had - was it very busy? Longer than usual at hockey or soccer after school? Did they sleep well the night before? Has their routine been interrupted in some way that was unexpected today? An argument with a sibling or friend?  If this is the first time they have balked at participating in home reading, and you can identify a reason why this might be, it never hurts to take a 'day off' from home reading.  Some families do this on any evening when there is an outside activity - 'daily' home reading really does mean 'as daily as possible for you and your family'. While we know the act of reinforcing reading is hugely beneficial for children at home, we also don't want to place undo pressure on families to get home reading done at all costs.

However....if the refusal to participate in home reading continues and your child does not seem keen or excited to participate, there are some simple things to do that might guide them back to the process. The first thing is to examine our own attitudes and practices related to home reading. Do we approach this task with kind enthusiasm as if this is an exciting part of our day? Do we truly participate in the child's efforts to become a reader (or are we surreptitiously checking our phone, hoping our child doesn't notice?). Have we acknowledged our child's successes as they attempted to read in the past, engaged in conversations about what they are reading, helped them make connections between two stories with similar ideas or something else they have experienced? How do we respond to hesitations, choppy reading, a million questions that divert from reading? Do we sigh heavily? Appear mildly irritated in our body actions even if we don't say anything?  For some of our children, if our heart is not in reading, theirs certainly isn't either! Therefore it is always a good thing to examine our own 'home reading' practices if our child suddenly no longer wants to participate in reading at home.

And, once we've taken a look at how we are modeling participation in home reading for our child, there are a few fairly easy things we can do, as parents, to encourage an unenthusiastic reader to jump back into the learning process again.  

• Be genuinely excited about home reading (after all, this is the most important academic skill your child will learn in an entire lifetime!) 
• Pick up the book and read to your child - if bargaining is still possible, offer to read first and then have your child read; or offer to engage in an echo reading session (you read rather slowly, the child echoes the text right behind you) - any form of engagement in reading behaviours is better than not reading at all
• Make a chart of all the books your child has read - a digital one can work as well, although it is harder for it to be visibly shared for your child to see and celebrate privately when it is digital; however, choosing a time to sit and celebrate the list each day or at the beginning of each reading session could be a great launch to bringing excitement back to home reading (and, since I am a sticker-lover myself, adding stickers to the home chart is an option if you are a parent who is like-minded :)
• begin a 'child's library' shelf where your child organizes favourite titles - by color, title, genre, author - this is a lovely way to begin preliminary conversations about how to organize books; and every now and then, shop for a title to add or get one from a local Little Free Library
• visit the public library and browse books together; make this a family event and share your choices with each other and why you chose them; library books get added to the chart as well
• talk with your child about reading, be explicit about when you are reading (recipes, billboards, menus, magazines, letters, bills, cards, etc) - the more often your child is aware of you reading, the more likely they will be to want to read
• make signs together for your home - my youngest daughters used to make a new sign each month, decorated with the fanciest coloured letters and illustrations, to hang on their bedroom doors; signs for other rooms advance the purpose of reading as well - or instructions for feeding the dog, turning out lights, etc. are handy to have around and lend authenticity to reading and to writing
• continue reading aloud to your child even when they are reluctant about reading themselves; the more modeling and vocabulary development, language fluency and voice modulation a child experiences, the more likely they are to be a successful reader themselves
• set goals with your child for reading - mini goals are loads of fun - "today I will read 3 pages of my new book, Dad will read 3 and Mom will read the title and the last page" - and also help the child understand how text is organized in a book; big goals work too - 'I will read 10 books all by myself before New Year's Eve'
• re-set the home reading routine to a different time - maybe before dinner? 
• try not reading a book for one night, just look at the pictures and talk about what might be happening
• use silly voices to be the characters when you are reading, laughter is a great way to share a book successfully
• have your child sign his own book to show he has read - full ownership of the reading practice is often a great motivator for children 

Most of all, accept that this too shall pass - your child will find a reason to re-engage in reading when they recognize it is both important and possible; that they have the skills, the support, the time and the materials to become a practicing reader. And every day they read, they become a little better at the reading process - recognition for a huge effort to become a skilled reader is the most important motivator of all. "You can do it!" holds absolute power for children, so long as we wrap them in the opportunities, the time and the relationships needed to ensure that becomes every child's home reading reality.

Lorraine Kinsman, Principal